80% of Corinne's life she was non responsive. I would just sit there for hours at her bed side rubbig and studying her body so I would never forget it.
I would trace her hair line along her ear. I would do the same thing with Evan when he was a baby and I nursed him.
She loved to be on her belly, since she had no movement we would have to reposition her every few hours to prevent bed sores, her belly was her favorite and she always seemed so peaceful in that position.
I was in love with her perfect little lips and could not wait until the day all of the ventilator and oxygen lines were gone and could see them in all thier perfection and kiss them over and over again. (and believe me when the time came I did!)
I miss her bright eyes, even though it was a special treat when we saw them. And when I did I know she saw me too. At times I thought she may have Evan's eyes.
I miss her "cry face", Corinne only cried a few times her first few days of life and oh how I loved that sound. After that it was just a face she made with no sound.
She had the most beautiful soft skin, which I always found strange since her body was failing her in so many ways and she was always being poked and prodded.
She had my fingers and my sisters toes.
She had a little birth mark on her thigh that kind of looked like a bunny (whenever I visit Corinne'S marker there is always a bunny there that runs back into his tree when he sees me).
I miss her smell! I slept with her things for months not wanting to wash them. I sadly realized her smell is hospital soap and plastic tubes and equipment. I know it sounds weird I would even smell her equipment I got to keep afterwards in hopes of brining back more memories or fear of forgetting the smell.
However bitter sweet our time was with her, I miss every minute of it! I truly felt like I did get to know her. I didn't get to hold her a lot, cuddle with her ,feed her, or shower her with thousand of kisses I would of liked. But she was a fighter, silent in her pain, and hopefully feeling the peace from all the love of her friends, family, and heavenly father around her.
I feel so blessed to believe in our wonderful God and to know that Corinne is in the most amazing place in the world shining down on us!
Birthmark on right thigh.. I know its hard to see
"my Hand"
"my sisters feet"
Her beautiful skin
Look at those beautiful eyes and bottom lip you just want to kiss!
Her "cry face"
Her favorite position
Corinne Sophia Moll perfect in her God given way.. go where we can SHINE baby girl!!
Beautiful, beautiful girl.
ReplyDeleteEmily I love these sweet pictures of your girl!! Thanks for sharing your heart!
ReplyDeleteShe is a beautiful little girl. I found you from Kelly's link-up. I am so very sorry you had to say goodbye to Corinne. I am saying a prayer for you now sweet mommy.
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